Continued

The good news is that I’ve applied for two jobs so far this week.  Not anything I’m likely to be hired for, of course, but one never knows.  The bad news is I’m still woeful, more depressed than I can ever remember being in the past.  And much like a huge immovable boulder, I don’t see a quick way around it.

Currently listening to “Bigger Man Than Me” by George Strait

Me

I guess it's okay to talk about this here.  This blog, after all, isn't just about my writing--it's about my life.  And my life is definitely a downer these days.  I am hopelessly depressed.  Unfortunately my mood swings make me unpleasant to be around.  Not that I'm the sociable type.  Sadly I never learned how to be a social butterfly; I've spent much of my life in a proverbial cocoon.  Even when someone says something nice or complimentary, I am simply struck dumb and unable to reply.  My shyness and awkwardness should never be mistaken for anything else.  I am simply too introverted to come across as friendly or grateful.  If you are born inside your shell, can you ever escape it?  Are you simply destined to always be a shy, depressed, sad person without a wealth of friends?

Exhausted

If anyone has a good insomnia cure, I would love to hear it.  I am drained lately, to the point where sometimes I think my arms will fall off.  I go to bed and can’t readily fall asleep, but I still wake up entirely too early in the morning.  My phone is off and my room is dark, and I rarely consume caffeine.  It’s seeped into my writing; I’m too tired to even sit at the computer and type much of anything.   Therefore, I am putting out a call for legal and safe sleep solutions, anything that will help me get some much needed rest and/or allow me to finish this book by the end of the year.

Writing Update

I’m not ashamed to say that book number five is kicking my rear-end.  It’s nearing the end of my proscribed story and it’s like pulling hen’s teeth to get the characters to help me along in the story.  Then again, they’re probably thinking that they’ve endured enough and they’re simply ready to move on.  Perhaps the problem is I’ve had too much on my mind these days—the general anxieties about money and my future, family, and such.  It’s nearly Thanksgiving which makes absolutely no sense.  This year vanished quicker than a dollar bill at McDonald’s.  I’ve also been in the process of reading one-too-many books and I guess, at the end of the day, that my brain is friend and in need of a respite.  Will I give it that much-deserved rest?  Yeah, all signs point to no.

Communication

Communication has never been my strong suit.  I struggle to tell people how I *really* feel.  I was never any good at writing letters, replying to emails, or returning phone calls.  Even now I am pretty slow at replying to Facebook messages and texts.   The good news is that I’m pretty excellent at sending Christmas and birthday cards.  It’s not that I don’t want to talk to you; it’s simply that my life has always been dull.  There’s not much to tell; I have always either A) gone to school; B) had my nose stuck in a book; or C) been unemployed.   If I fail to reply immediately, I am somewhere trying to gather up my thoughts and hoping I don’t come off as an idiot.  I am struggling to come up with something interesting and hoping I don’t flop.  I’m hoping you’ll remain my friend even if I’m not the life of the party.

Cold Weather Musings

I wonder sometimes about how far self-publishing will take me.  I have yet to explore a single published, which I am sure in counterintuitive.  I will try to make this a goal in the not-so-distant future, especially considering my decided lack of success in even finding positions to apply for these days.  Each and every rejection is like a missed opportunity.  So many things that I think I would be great at have fallen away from me, like lightning bugs I failed to catch in a Mason jar (or Ball, or Kerr, or whatever brand you like best; you can tell I’m from the country). 

Does anyone remember when Christmas used to wait until Thanksgiving had passed to show up?  Now it seems like Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas have merged into one gigantic superholiday, where we simply swap out orange and black candy for red and green candy the next day.  I certainly love Christmas, and its spirit, but you know how it is.  By the time it gets here, you’re mildly beleaguered. 

Very, very heavy frost this morning.  Old Man Winter showed up with a vengeance today.

November Update

Book sales have been quite good lately.  I’m not getting rich or anything but I am glad that people are downloading them freely or otherwise.   If you’d like to provide feedback or comments, I am always happy to hear them.  I’m hard at work on my fifth book, but this one may take longer than usual to get onto the market.  It’s going to require a lot of intensive, considerate editing as it is a much different story than I’ve written previously.  In the end, though, I hope my extra work and fresh approach will result in something worth reading.  

Heart of Tennessee

If Kentucky Summer was my love letter to the wonderful friends I encountered while spending my college years in Lexington, then Heart of Tennessee is an unapologetic love letter to those souls I’ve encountered during my travels and stays in the Volunteer State.  The citizens there are never less than kind, friendly, and helpful, and I hope I did the beautiful region of East Tennessee justice.  At any rate, following an extended review/editing/revision period, I am thrilled to be able to announce its publication.
http://www.amazon.com/Heart-of-Tennessee-ebook/dp/B009UVY2P4/ref=sr_1_1_bnp_1_kin?ie=UTF8&qid=1351865520&sr=8-1&keywords=heart+of+tennessee

http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Tennessee-Tommie-Conrad/dp/1480123552/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1351865520&sr=8-1&keywords=heart+of+tennessee