Lead On

This has been a tough week.  I haven’t necessarily had one, overarching crises, but sometimes the little things add up and become one big thing.  Even as I write this, I feel a headache coming on.  I wonder if I will ever stop being plagued by self-doubt?  Having one novel published (aside from the other six I self-published) helps, but I still have flaws and failings, be they real or imagined.  And sometimes the people with whom you need to communicate the most are the most dismissive.  I am also very tired as I write this.  I haven’t slept well in a very long time.  If you are able to sleep for eight interrupted hours, enjoy it.  Some of us would like to feel rested and therefore better able to tackle the problems that plague us while we are awake.  I hate that I feel this way—draggy, lethargic, as though the wind has been taken from my sails and all of the air let out of my tires.  I’m too young to always feel so  weary and exhausted.